Power of the Spirit: A New Bible Study on the Book of Acts

Hey there joyful mamas! It has been a while since I have popped my head up here on the blog, but not from lack of writing. I am happy today to be able to share HelloMornings' newest Bible study, to which I was honored to contribute.

Power of the Spirit is the first of a three part series entitled Jesus, Light of Nations that will ultimately take us all the way through the Book of Acts.

From the introduction by Ali Shaw:

In this series, we’ll take a journey through the Book of Acts and look carefully at both the actions of Christ’s apostles and of God’s powerful Holy Spirit. We’ll examine God’s plan to spread His message beyond the borders of the Judean province, shining His glorious light into surrounding nations and carrying the story of Jesus to the Gentiles. We’ll discover that God’s salvation knows no bounds; the Gospel message is for everyone!

This particular book in the Jesus, Light of Nations series focuses on the birth of the Christian Church and the power of the Spirit in the hearts and lives of the early Believers. Have you ever wondered what might have happened if the early followers hadn’t been obedient to God’s command to be witnesses? If the Gospel message of salvation hadn’t spread past Jerusalem, you and I might not be Believers today. The apostles’ obedience confirms the importance of submitting to God’s authority and the benefits of doing so. “Godliness with contentment is great gain.” (1 Timothy 6:6)

The Book of Acts shows us a mighty God who worked in miraculous ways to advance His Gospel and demonstrates the important fruit that comes with obedience; yet, it teaches us more. This book, which covers a 30-year span, traces the beginnings of the Christian church. It gives church doctrine, shows us doctrine in practice, lays the foundation for missions work, and shows us the patterns of church life. The sacrificial love of our Savior, the sharing of His Gospel, and living out belief in His resurrection are the themes of Acts. Through God’s empowering, we can live obediently and share Jesus like the apostles did. 

Acts is such a neat book to study—it is so unique in the Bible. If you are an adventure lover, this is the book for you! There is drama, suspense, and plot twists galore. Acts would make a great TV series! 😄

But Acts isn't just a historical record of the early Church. It also contains inspiration and wisdom that you and I can apply to our lives today. The Jesus, Light of Nations series will help you work your way through Acts in three 6-week studies, starting with Power of the Spirit.

You can do this study on your own, but if you'd like accountability, a group to discuss the study with, or just wish to grow in your habit of reading the Bible daily, consider joining a HelloMornings group. The next six week session starts on Monday, February 12.

I am delighted to have some digital copies to give away! Add your name to the Rafflecopter below for a chance to get yours (click on the email or Facebook button to begin). You can get up to 4 entries by doing various social media-y things. 😊  The giveaway ends at 11:59pm PST on Friday February 9. Winners will be notified on February 10.

UPDATE: Congratulations to Tammy, Linda, and Katie!

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When Children Doubt

We mamas want it all for our children.

We want them to be healthy, we want them to be productive members of society, we want them to be content. But more than anything, Christian mothers want their children to know the Lord and walk with Him.

Knowing Jesus means that if they are sick, or incapacitated, or struggling (the opposites of all those "wants" I listed) they can still live joy-filled lives for Him. They will look forward to eternity with Him.

So when children walk through seasons of doubt or questioning, many parents panic. I have watched families tighten rules until they strangle, out of fear for their children's salvation.

Obviously we need to set boundaries for our children. But the impetus for those boundaries should be love, not fear.

This week I talked about doubt in children in our monthly "Let the Children Come" series at Do Not Depart:

"I don’t want my children to have faith because I tell them to. I want them to live a life in relationship with the God of Creation. Relationships take time. When children are small, they take whatever we say at face value. But as they get older they need to come to a personal understanding and experience of God.... It is normal to have questions and doubts when you are growing in faith."

Read more about When Children Doubt in my post at DoNotDepart.com...

Cultivating Hearts: Planting What Lasts

I was disoriented.

The house in which I had birthed our second child was barely visible.

We had moved away fifteen years earlier and, on a whim while in the area, I decided to drive by to see what it looked like. I don’t know what I was expecting - probably the house frozen in my memory.

But as I turned the last corner I lost my bearings. 

My view of the house was completely obstructed by two giant trees. I stopped the car and stared. Those gigantic trees had not been there when we moved. But they were exactly where two little trees had been.

One spring, not long after we purchased our first house, my husband and I planted four little trees in the front yard, along with a tiny persimmon tree in the side yard. They were the first trees we had ever planted.

We didn't know what we were doing, so I purchased a book (at a bookstore - no one bought things online in 1995!) and from that book we learned how to plant and care for trees. 

The yard had been completely empty. Like most new builds in Texas, the builder had scraped the ground in the front, and the only green was some lumpy sod and a line of small bushes under the windows. So we added five tiny trees.

A year or so later, when our first baby was brand new, one of those little trees started leaning, as if it was so tired it wanted to lay its leafy head on the car in our driveway (I might have been projecting a little.) A green-thumbed friend came by to meet the baby, and as he was leaving, he gently touched the tree and told me I needed to stake it as soon as possible. A bit of wind might snap it in two.

Super-pixelated photo of my little guy and some scrawny trees

So I staked that sapling, and I kept watering it. It stayed supported for years (above you can see the "baby" riding a tricycle a few years later, and it is still getting help.) I was pretty sure I was terrible at raising trees. Really really terrible.

Years passed and the trees grew, but very slowly. Honestly, they embarrassed me. Right there in our front yard, a testimony to my lack of arboreal skills.

See that bendy tree back there? At this point it's 4 or 5 years old.

When our little guy was almost two years old I got pregnant again. At 13 weeks we lost our wee one in a dramatic miscarriage and hemorrhage that landed me in the emergency room. I was crushed.

It hurt so much that our baby was gone; I needed something tangible that would remind me of him, something to honor him. We went to the plant nursery and our two year old chose a tree for us to plant - a White Texas Redbud that would bloom at that time every year.

We planted the redbud in the back yard, and buried our baby at the foot of the tree. His tree grew strong, bloomed faithfully each year, and blessed my broken mama heart.

White TX Redbud image courtesy of Chalet Nursery

Our little side-yard persimmon tree also grew, and we even ate one or two persimmons from it as it slowly matured. Maybe I could do this tree thing after all?

But those front yard trees were still pathetic. Yes, they grew, but I was not happy with the rate. 

In 2003, now with two kids in tow, we sold our house with its scrawny trees. I hoped the next owners would be better at gardening.

Our house the day we left in 2003.

At our new homestead I planted a lot of trees. A LOT.

Not one survived. I am not exaggerating.

No matter how hard I tried, no matter where I planted them, and no matter how much I amended the soil, watered them, and carefully checked them, every single one died. They were eaten by goats or mowed over or blown down or just plain never leafed out.

It was confirmation - raising trees was not my gift.

__________

As I crept along our old street in 2016, I stared in awe at the trees.

Our old house in 2016.

This is time passing.

This is love and care coming to maturity.

This is something lasting.

And as I think about my tending and my care for my children, I see how often I jump to the conclusion that I am failing. That I have already failed. That it is done - what is now is forever, and these trials won’t pass.

Just like the trees on our homestead, there are times I have failed. Really and truly. Something has changed that can’t be fixed.

But sometimes what seems weak and spindly and ready to be snapped in half is just laying down roots. Sometimes grace is at work deep down, sap is flowing through the veins, and life is pushing through. Living Water is giving nourishment, and branches are reaching for the sky.

My first baby is now twenty. He is a man. He is a strong tree, strong enough even to support his old mama sometimes.

__________

Tending your saplings is long and sometimes tedious work. Growth can’t always be seen as it is happening. But mama, you are planting something lasting.

Cultivate the soil of your child’s heart patiently. Douse your child with prayer. Don’t give up; a beautiful tree will emerge and one day you will shake your head with wonder.

We All Need a New Beginning

I love the dark early morning. 

The windows are black, the house is still. There is something almost sacred about those quiet pre-dawn hours.

I make a hot drink and snuggle on the couch with my favorite blanket, devotionals, and my Bible. My kitten crawls onto my lap and snuggles in. I am in my happy place.

The dark windows slowly turn to gray. The sunrise is coming. I can’t see it directly from my favorite spot on the couch because the window faces west. But steadily a rainbow grows on the western horizon, signaling the coming day. Three hundred and sixty degree sunrises and sunsets are features of the rural Texas landscape that never grow old. 

From my window I see the field behind our yard, with mama cows and their new babies. The field slopes down to a pond, from which rises a gentle morning mist. On the other side of the pond, another hill rises to crest with a line of trees, forming the horizon. The shifting colors of the horizontal dawn rainbow brighten steadily.

A new beginning. Darkness turning to light. Making rainbows of hope along the way.

____________

I have had seasons of struggling with anxiety. The anxiety is worst in the very middle of the night.

In these hard seasons the clock almost always reads 2:00am when my eyes shoot open. My heart pounds. My mind floods with worries. There is a full-on battle happening in my body.

I know there are spiritual aspects when anxiety hits; there are physiological aspects as well. I fight the battle with prayer, with Scripture, with herbal tea, with protein.

"Weeping may tarry for the night, but joy comes with the morning.” Psalm 30:5b

And in the morning? When my eyes squint open again and the light streams in my windows, there is a palpable shift towards hope. Every single morning is a new start. 

"The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; His mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness.” Lamentations 3:22-23

____________

God’s Word is full of new starts, story after story of second chances and new beginnings. How we need those stories! 

My favorite online ministry, HelloMornings, is starting a new session next week, and this time the Bible study is all about new beginnings! I had the privilege of writing the third week, which focuses on David.

Oh that David, what a guy, right? Man after God’s own heart. Great- (times a bunch) grandfather to Jesus. Adulterer and murderer. Yeah. David’s story is for all of us who have steered wrong along the way.

And that would be all of us.

David, Noah, Abraham, Peter, Paul… they all needed new beginnings just like you and me.

____________

Will you join thousands of women around the globe as they seek to grow in being intentional about starting their day with God? You will be so blessed. You can join a group here, but hurry because registration closes soon!

This session I am so excited to share that for the first time the HelloMornings Bible study workbooks are available in print! You can order a physical copy through Amazon. Or you can get a digital download (with an audio option) here.

You can also enter my flash giveaway - yep, I have some digital copies (plus audio if you'd like) to give away! Yay! You can enter through the Rafflecopter widget below.

The flash part is because this is a speedy giveaway - don’t put it off, it is only open TODAY, closing at 11:59pm PST on Friday February 10.

I will announce the winners first thing on Saturday so that you have time to get your download before the session starts. If I can’t connect with a winner on Saturday I will select a replacement winner on Sunday. Big thanks to the HelloMornings team (I'm especially looking at you Kat Lee!) for making this giveaway possible.

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For the Mama Who Is Scared for Our Country

There sure are a lot of worried mamas out there.

So many mamas fretting for their children. Mamas fearing what the current election will bring and how it will change their babies' world.

There is worrying on all sides of the fence. Red and blue and independent mamas are crying real tears - dreading “what ifs.”

We wait to hear election results and my Facebook feed is filled with you, dear mamas. Mamas having panic attacks. Mamas cuddling kittens and eating ice cream to distract themselves. Mamas unfriending each other and being angry about people unfriending each other. 

I want to hug all of you. I want to say, “Yes, things will be hard. That is how the future is. It always brings some pain, no matter who our leaders are. But it brings joy too. So much joy, sweet mamas. Look at those worried faces looking up at you."

Because really tonight I am thinking most about the children. All of your beautiful God-given gifts. They see you worrying. They hear the discussions around the dinner table. When you are scared, they are scared too.

If you are walking with Jesus, you know Who is really in charge. You know that no crazy politics can dethrone Him.

 

He has you on His mind, and He has eternity as your plan. He loves those little people in your house far more than you ever can. 

So for those babies, wipe your tears and bake cookies. Read stories and sing songs. Find the beautiful things. Look for them, even if it takes a while. I promise they are there.

I took my baby to vote today. His very first vote in a Federal election. I really didn’t envision it this way when he made these seven-year-old election reform suggestions. But here we are.

He has a say in his country. He may not like his choices, and I may not like mine, but I am thankful we have the privilege of having a part to play.

It was a gray dripping day. The flowers in the front yard were still lovely. The kitten was still curious. The world was still beautiful.

If you are passionate about politics and want to get involved to make a difference, please please do. We need you. 

And if all you feel right now is overwhelmed, just love the people right in front of you. The biggest most beautiful change you can make in the world is to really love the people right in front of you.

So on this election night, as we await the news of who will be the next President of the United States, I come back to what I remind myself of over and over:

Choose love.

Find beauty.

You will change the world.

Stand Firm - The Importance of Sound Theology

Theology is for university types, right? 

Old white men in their ivory towers, wearing cardigans, smoking pipes, and using terms no one understands.

Nah, you know I don't believe that.

Simply put, theology is "the study of the nature of God and religious belief." If you read your Bible, you are immersing yourself in theology.

But sometimes, especially when you are a new believer, even things in the Bible can seem confusing. Certainly all the voices clamoring for your attention on the Internet (including mine) can make things confusing! 

How do we deal with this? How do we know what is right?

Good theology is the fruit of study and of reliable sources. It is worth your time to really pay attention to your theology and make sure that what you believe aligns with the Word of God.

At Do Not Depart this month our theme is "Why Sound Theology Matters for Every Woman." The writing team has taken turns addressing different reasons why it makes a difference for you to think through what you believe.

Today I am writing about how good theology helps you to stand firm. Here is a glimpse...

When I was a young believer, I was both passionately committed, and continuously confused.

I wanted more than anything to follow Jesus and walk in His ways, but I had almost no Bible knowledge. I would hear someone talk on Christian radio, or see a sermon on TV, and not know whether what they were saying was true. I’d have conversations with people of varying Christian backgrounds, and their positions would contradict. Who was right?

Then I would go grocery shopping at the health food store, and see New Age books, and talk with non-Christians, and some of the things they said made sense to me. What was going on?!

Read the rest of my post on standing firm at Do Not Depart. Stand firm sisters!

When You Are Worn Out, This is the Habit to Focus On

Are you worn out, sister?

Are the kids too needy, the days over scheduled and the house trashed?

You need a little Jesus, don'tcha? Nah - a lot of Jesus.

How are your quiet times going? Not going so much? Yeah, I get it.

It is a constant battle isn't it? To be in the world but not of it, to keep our eyes fixed on Jesus... it's a daily struggle.

When my kids were young, and I knew I was going to homeschool, I became enamored of the writings of nineteenth century educator Charlotte Mason. I loved her gentle approach to teaching young children. But I was most impressed (and convicted) by her writings on habit.

Mason's contention was that when we train our children to have good habits a huge part of our parenting and educating battle is already won. But her words made me look at myself, and ooo boy I did not like what I saw.

I am not going to pretend that fifteen years later I have all the good habits and have ditched the bad. Goodness, back then some of the bad habits I fight now didn't even exist (I'm looking at you iPhone and Facebook.)

Still, the habit of rising and starting the day in God's Word will always be a blessing. I am not completely faithful in it, and when I slip I feel it. I am a much nicer and more patient person when my brain has been seasoned with Truth.

If you want to develop the habit of starting the day with Jesus, I highly recommend the HelloMornings ministry. When you join a HelloMornings group you will have the accountability of like-minded women who are also wanting to grow with Jesus by meeting with Him daily.

I am so blessed, y'all. I had the privilege of collaborating on the Bible study for this upcoming session too. Six years ago, when I first participated in HelloMornings, I never would have dreamed that I would have the joy of being a part of writing the studies. Isn't God delightful?

Because God's Word is living and active, you do not need to have gone through part 1 of But We See Jesus to be able to do this study. Just jump in now.

And (woohoo!) I have copies to give away! You can enter on Twitter, or on Facebook. Or both! I will be drawing names on Saturday morning.

If you want to give HelloMornings a try, head over now and join - a new session is starting on Monday October 10, 2016! You may just find it changes your life!

How a Mama Can Do Scary Things Anyway

I have fear on my mind a lot these days. Seems like there are oodles of things taking me out of my comfort zone. 

For starters, we are thinking about moving. The realities of packing up and downsizing a family and a farm, plus finding a suitable home in a fairly high-priced market have virtually paralyzed me. How can I get it all done? How will we ever find the right house? Is this really the best thing for our family? It’s an annoying subconscious soundtrack.

Then there are the movies. No, not watching movies. Being in movies. Gah! Abbie is our resident actress, and has been on the stage since she was six. Now we are trying to find ways for her to begin to explore film acting, and have fallen into several situations where we were able to be extras in movies. Yes, me too.

*cue heart palpitations and sweaty palms*

Camera on a track for panning shots

And today, Abbie and I attended a self defense class at our awesome local jiujitsu studio. Good grief, talk about being out of my comfort zone. I clearly need to get my act together with exercise because I do not want to stay in a place where the anticipation of being thrown to the floor (a well padded floor at that) had me in tears at home this morning. Be still my beating, terrified heart. 

A blurry iPhone picture of us flipping each other

Yep, I have been pretty steadily out of my comfort zone for the past two weeks. Do you ever find yourself there?

I am pretty much a hobbit. I would far rather stay at home and have my friends over for an endless parade of teas and pastries than do scary things. I’ll admit I am a bit of a Baggins-ish hobbit because I do enjoy traveling adventures (ask me about my 4000 mile road trips with my kids). But I am still a homebody on a regular day. Risk-taking is not in my DNA.

Still, I have learned that letting fear rule my decision making almost always results in regret. And I have also learned that forcing myself to do the scary things almost always results in joy.

It’s like a tidy equation:

decision making + fear = regret
scary things + courage = joy

Does that even make sense? I don’t know, it isn’t especially logical, but it accurately reflects my experience.

I am so glad I readjusted my plans, got off my hiney, and got the kids out the door to the film sets. We made memories that will last a lifetime. What would I have done if I had stayed home? Sat on the couch surfing Facebook? Cleaned something for the one millionth time? Bleh.

The self-defense class showed me some useful things:

1. It is not as scary as I think to fall on a rubber mat (yes it does hurt a bit).
2. I have more natural aggression than I realized.
3. All the stuff I learn goes right out of my head when I am put on the spot (that was valuable but uncomfortable to experience).
4. I need and actually want to practice this stuff.

There is something exhilarating about facing the things you are afraid of and conquering them!

So how does a mama make herself do scary things? My scary things might be different from your scary things, but I’ll bet we have the same motivator to push through our issues: our kids.

My children make me brave. Bravery isn’t about not being afraid. Bravery is being afraid and doing the thing anyway.

All of the scary events of the past few weeks were important for my children’s sake. My love for them helped push me out of my comfort zone and ultimately into the joy zone (thanks to that simple equation: scary things + courage = joy)

This is just another way that love leads to joy. Even if you don’t have kids, I’ll bet there is someone in your life you love who can inspire you to do scary things.

And while at first pass this may sound kitschy and cliche, if you are a Christian, your love for Jesus is probably the greatest motivator of all.

There are terrifying things I have done only because I love Jesus. Writing Bible studies, leading women’s groups, asking a stranger if I can pray for them, wearing a head covering, reading the Bible out loud at our church service, oh goodness, so many things for this introvert.

I am really just a trembling little girl in a grown-up body. But love can super-size me. It pushes me and pushes me until I am right out of my hobbit hole and quivering on the edge of some new and uncomfortable experience, ready to slog through fear to reach the joy on the other side.

Do you have a scary thing facing you right now? Whom will you love and bless by walking right into it? I would be my privilege to pray for you, for abounding love and for the courage to go forward. Leave me a comment or send me an email (patti @ joyfulmama dot com).

Let’s add courage-because-love to our scary things, and reap the joy! 

Praying for Those Entangled in Persecution

It is a given that Christians will face persecution. Scripture is clear:  

“Indeed, all who desire to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted” 2 Timothy 3:12

While I have been treated differently at times because I am a Christian, it has never been a cause of real suffering. Yet around the world, there are huge numbers of Christians suffering profoundly because of their faith in Jesus Christ.

This week I wrote about persecution at Do Not Depart: 

"According to the non-profit organization Open Doors, 2015 was the worst year in modern history for Christian persecution: 'More than 7,100 Christians were killed for faith-related reasons, and 2,400 churches were destroyed or damaged.' 

Our brothers and sister in Christ are suffering. As painful as it is to recognize this reality, our hearts are connected to theirs as members of the body of Christ. It is our privilege to pray for them.

And not only are we called to pray for fellow believers, we are also instructed to pray for those who persecute."

In the post I share:

• the story of Taher, a persecutor who came to Christ
• what the Bible says about persecution
• a simple prayer for those entangled in persecution

Read the whole post here: Praying for the Persecuted and for Those Who Persecute
 

When Your Plans to Read the Bible Fall Through

Have you ever read the whole bible in a year? Or tried to?

You know what they say about the best laid plans...

The Plan

In January 2015 I decided that I would read the Bible in a year. It is easy to miss the richness buried in infrequently read books (Obadiah anyone?), and reading right through the Bible is a fantastic way to get the whole picture.

So in addition to various Bible studies I was working through, I planned to listen daily to an audio Bible plan that would take me straight through from Genesis to Revelation.

The Reality

But life isn’t always “straight through," and guess what? I didn’t read the Bible in a year. In fact, I am still working my way through now, twenty months later.

I am going to read through the Bible in two years. :-)

Failure?

I could focus on the fact that I did not read the whole Bible in a year. Better yet, I can celebrate that I am reading the Bible! Yay! Hey, I could even cheer because I am going extra fast on a read-the-Bible-in-three years plan. ;-)

Here's the thing: this is not the first time I will read the whole Bible, and it won't be the last. I will be reading this book until the day I meet my Lord face to face. And the enemy of my soul would love to discourage me from reading it by whispering: You failed. You got behind. What's the point?

Sister, any bit of the Word you can get into your heart and mind today will be expanded mightily in your life by the God of all creation Who loves you beyond reason. Any little bit.

Like this:

That right there is half a verse. Half! Believe me, if you spend a little time meditating on that half verse while you fold the laundry, I guarantee God will fill your heart. 

That is the point.

Whose Expectations?

Don’t hold yourself to an impossible standard. If you fail to meet expectations, take a moment to ask whose expectations they are? Yours? Someone else’s? God’s?

Yes, there are times when we are being wayward or rebellious. If you have fallen behind in your reading or studies for this reason, it will be a great blessing to you if the Lord convicts your heart!

But so often (especially for we first-born, type-A sorts) the demands we labor under are put on us by ourselves. Not by God.

Are you in a season of mothering small children? Probably not the time to plan to spend an hour reading your Bible every day. But you can read a passage. You can listen to the Bible app while you do the dishes. You can do something.

You don’t have to do everything.

There are seasons for the reading the bible in a year. This may not be the season.

Your Love Letter!

The Bible is a love letter from the Father. You and I have the astonishing privilege of living in a time when we can pick up a Bible at any time and read. Every word is for strengthening, blessing, and growing us.

You can choose to hold yourself to hard-to-attain standards. Or you can choose to be held.

Drink from the well of His Word in sips or gulps... no matter how much you consume at a time, you will be nourished.

A People Pursued {A Bible Study Giveaway From HelloMornings}

One of the amazing blessings of being still and listening for God's will is that you get to do some really cool things - things you might not have seen coming.

A few months ago, when I was still in the throes of I-just-can't-blog-because-I-am-barely-surviving mode, my dear friend Ali asked me to pray about contributing to a HelloMornings Bible study.

Ali and I are close real-life friends (we met at our daughters' homeschool theater class) and she knows all the mess that has been my life. We also write together at DoNotDepart.com. I had continued writing there, but it was just by the skin of my teeth. So she knew that the answer might be no. Honestly, my first thought was, "Impossible."

But I prayed.

God showed me exactly when I would have time to write, and got me more and more excited about digging into Hebrews. So I said yes, with great anticipation. The fruit of that was But We See Jesus, a study of the first half of Hebrews, written with five other women. God's fruit is the best fruit, isn't it?

When Ali told me that the next HelloMornings study would be on Hosea and invited me to write again, I was intrigued.

Hosea the prophet can sound at first pass like an Israelite Debbie Downer, let me tell ya! He was the very last prophet to the northern kingdom of Israel before they were taken into captivity, so it is not surprising that his words come across as a last-ditch effort to a doomed people. They kind of were.

But when you take the time to dig into the book of Hosea, it is amazing how love and hope shine through. There is so much Jesus in Hosea! 

Intrigued? I hope you are, because HelloMornings has just released A People Pursued, their new study on Hosea, and as one of the authors I have the privilege of giving away a copy to one of you!

And this is super cool: not only will you get the reading plan, commentary, Bible study questions and worksheet, you'll also get a full audio of the entire study! If time is short you can just turn on the audio and listen while exercising, driving to work, folding laundry - wherever it fits into your day.

HelloMornings is one of my favorite ministries. It is a great help for growing in being intentional about spending time with God, planning your day, and exercising. The next session starts on August 15. Check it out!

I just have to come back to this: sometimes when you stop and ask God, He ends up leading you somewhere you wouldn't have planned. Writing Bible studies this summer was not on my calendar. I had pretty much decided I had failed Him. And all the while He was waiting for me to let Him keep my calendar.

This giveaway has ended now. Congratulations Tammy!!

Now on to the giveaway! *cowbells ring and confetti falls*

Just enter through the cool Rafflecopter widget below. I will contact the winner first thing on Sunday morning so you have time to download the study before the session begins. Yay for giveaways!

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This giveaway ends on Saturday August 13 at 11:59pm CST. Huge thanks to Kat Lee and HelloMornings for making it possible!

Still Not Perfect, But Oh So Loved

I have spent my whole life trying to be good.

When I was a little girl I would lie in the dark each night and tell God all the things I had done that I thought I shouldn't have, then I would ask Him to make me a better person the next day. 

Each night I would ask the same thing. Make me better. Make me better. Please.

It wasn’t until I was an adult and actually read the bible that I began to grasp the problem. Sin. It was there and always would be. 

I spent a season in my twenties wrestling with God about the verse “Therefore you are to be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.” (Matthew 5:48) 

It seemed downright mean. On the one hand I knew I couldn’t be perfect because of sin, but on the other I was being told I should be? It didn’t make sense, it frustrated me, and honestly, made me a little angry. So I argued with God.

I have never felt squashed when I have wrestled with God. I feel no condemnation, and don’t feel dismissed, even though I imagine my questions and strugglings are ridiculously small.

I know in my core that God gave me my intellect to be used.  After all, He says "Come now, and let us reason together” (Isaiah 1:18a). I can’t say I'll ever fully understand Matthew 5:48, but I believe God has helped me to grasp some of it.  

Jesus is perfect, and when I am hidden in Him, I am covered by His perfection. My spiritual self, my eternal self, is abiding and hidden in Christ.

But my earthly self, the girl stuck on soil, needs to know what to do. God's perfection is what I try to walk toward in my daily life (I won't get there)… and really, what that means is that I am walking toward Jesus, toward being more like Him.

It’s always all about Jesus, isn’t it?

Funny how we can know something but our actions don’t show it. I knew that spiritually I was hidden in Christ. But every day I was sweating and striving. I was exhausted from striving.

Yep, I know all about grace, but clearly I have a very hard time accepting it. 

I am forty seven years old now. I am no longer the nine year old who lay in bed asking God: Please make me better. 

Now I am asking Him: Please make me more like You. Open my eyes to the need. Help me to bless someone. Forgive me for being selfish.

And I still struggle with trying to live the Christian life in my own strength. I still fall asleep determined to do better the next day. Because let’s be honest: to walk the dying-to-self road can be painful and hard and sometimes just plain lonely.

I have experienced the trouble with trying to soldier through, head down and focused. When the slightest twist in the road comes, I get completely off course. Fists clenched, determined to walk the path I think I should as a loving daughter of her Heavenly Father, I suddenly find that in my haste and determination I am slogging through a muddy ditch because I was so set on my direction, I didn’t see the road veer off.

Ugh. Here we go again.

I am slowly accepting my desperate need for God’s grace, not just in theory, but in practice. No amount of determination will change the fact that I still have the heart of a little girl. I need to be able to rest in my Father’s lap and be held by His arms. Not for any reason other than that laps are where little girls belong.

We have had a hard few years in our family. And most of the things I wanted to do for God, the plans I had for how I was going to use the gifts He has given me… most of those things have not gotten done. So on top of the pain I was working through because of those hard years, I felt a heavy burden of guilt. I felt like I had failed the One Who never fails me.

He is such a good, good Father. When I took the time to stop scurrying, to be still and ask Him to show me what He wanted from me, He poured out nothing but love and grace over me - even though I had not done all those things I was so sure I had to do to please Him. I didn’t finish any of the books I had started writing, I didn’t blog here or on our other blog, all I did was survive, and try my best to love the people right in front of me each moment.

What I want more than anything is to please Him. Like a little girl helping her Daddy paint a wall and getting paint all over the floor, I want to do the things that make Him proud of me, yet I mess up. Over and over I can’t paint that wall perfectly.

Here God, let me help You with that...

And He bends down and strokes my hair, sees my heart and says “I love the wall. I love that you want to help. I love you."

My tender Father.

It is time to add one more thing to my night whispers: Please help me to accept Your grace, Abba.

God Shows His Love for Us...

God gives gifts in different measure. One of the gifts listed in 1 Corinthians 12 is the gift of faith. It sure seems like we all need faith, right? But He gives an extra measure of faith to some of His children.

For those who have not been given that special helping of faith, doubt is occasionally, and sometimes often, a source of challenge. It is not like we can reach out our hands and touch God's face. We don't hear him audibly.

Yes, I know, His hand is everywhere, and He speaks to us through His Word. But when things are hard, we waver.

I think that lack of concreteness, combined with an endless stream of challenges this side of heaven, is what causes so many people to wonder if God cares about them.

Have you ever wondered, "Does God really love me? After all I have done?"

The answer, of course is yes. You and I can know this is true by what He has done for us. For broken, stumbling, still-making-mistakes you and me.

What has He done for us? Read more about God's Ultimate Demonstration of Love in my post today at Do Not Depart....

 

God is Big Enough

My head is down. How can it not be? I am walking through brambles and every single step threatens my upright position. To fall would mean not only gashes but further entanglement. I keep my eyes on my feet.

There is no way out of this thorny brush except by going forward. Diligently I wrench each foot up, pulling free of the mess and setting it down ahead, only to be caught again as I wrestle the other foot up and out. 

The thorns dig into my ankles. The scratches itch and burn. When I look closely I see trickles of blood running into my socks.

Sometimes I stop. I stand still and just breathe. A single wet line trickles from my hair into the corner of my eye. The sweat burns. I wonder if my eyes are tearing from the pain or if I am crying. I am so exhausted I don’t know any more.

I look ahead. Nothing but the same. More and more brambles. No path. Impossible. Hope trembles. My resolve wavers and I think it might be time to just sit down in the thorns and give up. 

~~~

Sometimes into a life comes a big obstacle. And sometimes a full set.

Some obstacles are of our own making. Some are thrust upon us.

It doesn't really matter where they come from. What matters is what you do with them. What you do about them.

~~~

Last week I spent a few hours with a far-away friend I rarely see. You know how it is when you are in the presence of someone who just understands? Someone who loves the Lord like you do and is steadily abandoning her ideas of how life should be, to relax deeper and deeper into His will? 

My friend gets it. She has counted the cost. She understands that when you give your life over to His plan, it is not going to look how you expected. It does not mean life will get easy. It may even mean that suffering and sacrifice fall immediately on your head.

But she has lived the joy, has eaten the fruit of a life lived poured out. She has counted the cost and found it worthwhile. 

My friend has much joy in her life. And she also has an impossible situation. A deeply difficult and painful situation, over which she has little control.

On January 1 she picked up a bracelet and put it on her wrist. It says “God is Big Enough.” She is believing that and praying that over her impossible situation, every single day of 2015. 

When she shared this with me last week, the happy chatter and distraction of children prevented me from responding fully. Not that I could have, as I felt like my soul was gasping for breath. 

God is big enough.

God is big enough.

Even for my brambles.

~~~

My calculations say that we are sinking, sinking - drowning in a joblessness that is going to suck the very life from us.

But truth says God is big enough to provide.

My eyes see people constantly misunderstanding, seemingly determined to believe the worst of each other, the worst of me, no matter what I do or say.

But truth says God is big enough to restore.

My ears hear whispers of self-accusation: “If only you had…” If only you were more….” “You shouldn't…"

But truth says God is big enough for my failings.

My body is filled with pain, with solutions for each pain causing greater pain elsewhere.

But truth says God is big enough to heal.  

~~~

Why is suffering so intricately woven into the journey of faith? Great men and women of the ages have asked this and debated the answer. I don’t know. I just know that the result can go two ways.

I can suffer and harden.

Or I can suffer and be laid bare.

Because of Jesus, and only because of Him, suffering and being laid bare is where I journey. The pain strips me of myself. Drops me to my knees. I fall before Him, on Him. 

He is big enough to hold me up.

~~~

All the brambles of the earth shrivel before the thorny cross on my Savior’s brow. 

Sometimes He seems to take up holy pruning shears and just snips those wretched vines from my ankles. Makes a path straight out of the forest into the sunshine. He is a God of miracles. 

Other times He patiently holds my hand as I do the hard work of walking up and out. The slow hard work. He is a God Who is present and gives strength.

I have no idea how He will make a way out of this mess of messes. But I know He is big enough.

God is big enough.

Persevering in Prayer: The Example of Monica of Hippo

by Ary Scheffer, 1846

Have you ever prayed for someone for a long time? A really really long time?

Do you ever wonder if those prayers make a whit of difference?

John is pretty clear:

This is the confidence which we have before Him, that, if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. And if we know that He hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests which we have asked from Him. - 1 John 5:14-15

Scripture affirms that God hears and answers when we pray in His will. But wow, sometimes the answers are sooo long in coming. I find discouragement setting in. It can be hard to persevere.

Then I think of Monica of Hippo.

Monica was the poster child for praying without ceasing. Her heart burned for her husband and children to know God, and despite their paganism, their adultery, their tempers... she never gave up.

And the fruit of Monica's perseverance in prayer and quiet life of faith? You might be surprised just who it was she was praying for.

Read more about Monica of Hippo in my post at Do Not Depart.

When the Path is Steep, You Are Not Alone

In the economy of my life, words are the currency.

I am fascinated by language, find greatest internal clarity when I write, and am bolstered by encouraging words from others.

Yet it is my eyes that direct my words.

The eye is the lamp of the body. - Matthew 6:22

I am such a visual person that I can not think clearly when there is clutter around me (and if you know me well you now understand why I never think clearly!) My prayer life is filled with images.

I take visual snapshots - I still remember the first time I did this, a tender moment with my two dearest friends from college when I was about 20 years old. We lay on a futon on the floor talking about deep and precious things, and their gentle faces and tousled hair all mixed together was so beautiful I yearned to freeze the image forever. So I took a picture with my mind. I can see it still.

When I write, I am often simply describing what I see. Ideas have form and color and light in my mind. Analogies and allegories are commonplace. I don’t make this happen. It happens to me.

So perhaps you will understand when I tell you that the past four months, maybe longer, yes longer, I have been on an arduous trek through a most difficult mountain range. I have crossed parched deserts, dragging my feet in deep sand. Climbed and climbed and climbed steep summits. I have come out unexpectedly into glorious meadows filled with the most beautiful wildflowers, and been served by angels. I have rested by deep and clear lakes. My feet have been tangled in dark thorny weeds, and I have fallen and bled again and again.

I have been on a journey and I am bone weary.

In non-allegorical life? Financial stress, uncertainty, new businesses, deep relational challenges, a gloriously beautiful trip to China with my father, unidentified health problems, failure, success, failure and failure again. 

There are days when I feel like I am staring into the face of the lion that wants to devour me. Because I am. When life gets rough, when things become uncertain, don’t we begin to wonder? To doubt a little?… Did I have this all wrong? If I had done it all the world's way, would things be different?

Those are the waverings the enemy watches for. The opportunity he hopes to exploit.

Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. - 1 Peter 5:8

Hurts and fears and missteps pile up, and without solid ground to stand on, even the most faithful find it hard to stand firm. How wary we sons and daughters must be of stepping onto shifting sands! Only the Rock of our salvation gives true footing.

My soul, wait in silence for God only,

For my hope is from Him.

He only is my rock and my salvation,

My stronghold; I shall not be shaken. 

- Psalm 62:5-6

We all come to crossroads in our lives. Indeed, most of us encounter such intersections more than once as we walk the path we have been given. Which way do I go? Do I go the way that seems easy, the wide road that everyone would tell me to follow? Or do I take this hard dirt path that my heart and His Word say to walk?

I always pray to take the Lord's way, but sometimes it is so painful. The way of service and love is the way of hard work. Not just hard work with my hands, but the hard work of allowing God to transform my heart and mind.

It is not in our nature to give and give. It is not in our nature to put others before ourselves. When people argue against Christianity I wonder if they understand what Jesus said and how He lived. Who would suggest that the best way to chart the course of your life is by giving everything up for others? This is not an idea formed in a human mind. Jesus’ way is completely upside down from the way we think the world should run. The first shall be last? It defies human logic! 

This is what the LORD says: "Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls." - Jeremiah 6:16a

This year my family has chosen to walk differently. To take a leap into the unknown in many ways and try something that we know God has been calling us to. I wouldn’t change a thing. God’s plans are always the best plans. But they don’t always look the way we expect. Our leap did not produce glorious financial results, but it has borne the eternal fruit of deepened love and family ties upon which no price can be set. We have made difficult sacrifices in the name of relationships. We have faced painful challenges and done all we could to walk uprightly. We have wept. It has been a season of much feeling. 

As we have struggled, we have not been alone. We have been blessed with tangible assistance, real help with real needs. And the hands that have helped meet our physical needs have also been hands that have folded in prayer for us, hands that have lifted ours when we could not lift our own. (Exodus 17:11-12)

Gratitude is a paltry word to describe the swell of emotions just writing this brings. 

Two verse snippets have been my companions:

Hope does not disappoint
- Romans 5:5a

Love never fails
- 1 Corinthians 13:8a

There have been times when it has only been the dogged choice to hold onto and believe those verses that has kept me from drowning.

Sometimes it seems like hope is being disappointed and love is failing.

But it is all about perspective. When I train the microscope of my attention on a string of seeming losses and failures, there is nothing allowed in the picture but despair. Yet when I set the microscope down, take a deep breath, and stand back... stand way way back… I begin to allow an eternal perspective to gently filter into view.

I see people who are growing, sin that is being dealt with, something lasting and beautiful that is being built. 

The road is exhausting. The ups and the downs seem like they want to kill me some days. I long for the security of my warm soft bed… a place sometimes I would prefer to stay all day.

This is real life.

And Jesus is right in the middle of my real life. Because of His grace I can say, “I have failed” and not feel condemned. Because of His forgiveness, I can say to those I have wronged, “Please forgive me” and I will be freed from the burden of guilt.

I am still walking this hard road. It has real impact on my daily life and on my health and on my work. I am a writer who is struggling to write, and that is not a fun place for a writer to be. But because I am walking this road with the lover of my soul, I will survive the agonies and the exhilarations. And astonishingly, He will use them both to make me more like Himself. What an impossibly loving Lord He is.

For I, the LORD your God, hold your right hand; it is I who say to you, “Fear not, I am the one who helps you.” - Isaiah 41:13

The road will level out, I know it will. It always does. And in these steep parts when I stumble, His strong hand holds me firm. I am still gasping for breath some days and my muscles tremble from the effort, but I am not alone.

Is your journey steep today? Hold tight to His holy hand. Take heart. There is purpose in your pain. And who knows? This might be just around the next bend...

He makes me lie down in green pastures.
He leads me beside still waters.
He restores my soul.
- Psalm 23:2-3a

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This song from Christa Wells kept playing in my head as I wrote this post...

ON THE MOUNTAIN
I’ve been climbing my whole life
and I’m only at the bottom of the mountain,
at the bottom of the mountain 
Rising up from my feet
in the daylight
rising up into the clouds and out of my sight
is the height of that mountain 

Well my hands cannot reach it
and my mind can’t comprehend it
but my soul is gonna get there one day
No, my hands cannot reach it
and my mind can’t comprehend it 
but my soul is gonna get there one day

Lord, these shoes are gonna need some help
so we can make it to the top of the mountain 
to the top of your mountain
Many feet have gone before us
with a habit of faith and courage
they’ll meet us at the road’s end

Well my hands cannot reach it
and my mind can’t comprehend it
but my soul is gonna get there one day
No, my hands cannot reach it
and my mind can’t comprehend it 
but my soul is gonna get there one day

Yes, yes I think I will
Oh Yes I know we will
Yes yes I know we will
Oh yeah, I know we will

I’ve been climbing my whole life 
and I’m only at the bottom of the mountain
at the bottom of the mountain
All along this road
when it feels so
far to the top, you say, just hold on to the mountain 

Well my hands cannot reach it
and my mind can’t comprehend it
but my soul is gonna get there one day
No, my hands cannot reach it
and my mind can’t comprehend it 
but my soul is gonna get there one day
Well my soul (oh, my soul) is gonna get there one day

(press play below to hear the song)

To a Young Writer: Why You Should Write Even When You Are Afraid

Recently a young writer friend of mine shared on social media how the pressure to write was building inside of her. Building and brewing... she knew something was going to pop out…not yet, but soon.

Words, waiting and pressing.

I understand. Some days it feels as if my chest will explode if I don't sit down and make words happen with my hands. Talking doesn’t release the pressure. Only writing. And half the time I don't even know what words will come. But come they will.

Many writers I know battle fear daily. Perhaps it is because so many writers are deeply sensitive souls. Often shy and quiet in person, these wanderers and wonderers have internal rivers that run deep.

The vulnerability of putting thoughts and feelings on the page can be overwhelming. The thought of being truly known can paralyze.

So when another friend responded that everything this young woman writes on her blog now will be “lame" in 10 years, my writer’s heart stage-whispered, “Tread softly!”

Our mutual friend is an artist too. A musician. So what he probably did not realize is that this is a deep-seated fear for most writers. That what we write is stupid, that what we think doesn't make sense and isn't important.

Fear is a death knell to a well of beauty and inspiration.

And I wonder. What if Tolkien had succumbed to this fear? What if Shakespeare decided people wouldn't understand his jokes? What if Dickens worried that his stories were too dark and that exposing the true underbelly of the industrial age would get him in trouble? What if Paul had said, “Enough is enough. I'm being persecuted, people are trying to kill me on every side! Writing letters just incriminates me more!"

What if writers didn't write?

And what if musicians didn’t make music?

If Beethoven gave up because he couldn't hear? If John Newton gave into thinking people would criticize him for being vulnerable about his faith journey in Amazing Grace? If all those Christian worship songwriters whose work we enjoy every Sunday threw their hands up in the air and said, “This is just too hard. And maybe I’ve got it wrong somewhere. Forget it.”

We all have incredible worth in the eyes of our God. We have each been created to do something beautiful in the world in His name. Yet none of us is perfect. And none will be this side of heaven.

So our work must be imperfect. Do I look back ten years to my very first blog entry (yes, coming up on a decade in one week) and cringe? Maybe a little. But I also see a snapshot. I see a snapshot of a woman on whom God was working. I remember the things He was doing in my life because I recorded them. And I am reminded of the person I was and how He has grown me.

Will I cringe reading this very post in ten years? Possibly. I have written far more important things (and pray I will continue to) that will probably make me cringe more.

And in the end?

The why.

Why write? Why make music?

For me it is because I was made to do it. The Creator chose this thing for me, I didn’t choose it. In fact I have downright rejected it at times. It is scary and uncomfortable and frankly a whole lot of work. Little recognition, a lot less pay. And did I mention uncomfortable?

If we are His, then we must be who He made us to be. We must write, we must make music, we must saw wood, or bake bread or teach. If we don’t then we are missing the glorious joy of being right in the middle of His will. Who knows what He has in mind to do with the gifts He has given us? We have to just walk in it.

And along the way we absolutely will stumble. We'll say wrong things. We may even hurt those we love.

Yet how do muscles strengthen without hard work and pain? How does the seamstress make perfect stitches without starting with sloppy ones? How does a drummer learn a new beat without missing it a jillion times and trying again and again?

If we keep our eyes fixed, fixed on the Lover of our souls, if we humble ourselves and give Him everything we have today, He will be glorified. The sacrifice of vulnerable words is not missed by the one Who Himself is the Word.

My sweet young friend, yes, maybe (but not certainly) what you write today will seem “lame" to you in ten years. Write it anyway. Twenty years ago you yourself were essentially lame. Today you walk expertly. Then you were mute. Today you are a fluent English speaker. We all begin as infants in all that we do. And we grow.

Grow gloriously in what He made you to do.