This joy thing. It does not come naturally.
There I stood, hands in a sink of dirty dishes. Grumbling. Silent grumbling... turning over grievances, rehearsing rebuttals.
Yet knowing this grumbling is wrong. What is it in me, Lord, that makes my brain fill with stinkin' thinkin'?
The wise woman builds her house,It breathed into my brain. My grumbles paused as I tripped over something new in that well-worn passage. She builds her house. Not... she built her house then sat smugly back to survey her domain. No... she builds. She is doing. She keeps doing.
But the foolish tears it down with her own hands.
She doesn't stop.
There it is. The thing that makes me grumbly. It never stops. I don't mean the dishes (although their perpetuity elicits grumbles at times as well).
Building my house, my family, my legacy... it never stops. Seeing my own sin... it never stops.
Having to grow, to try, to ask forgiveness... to start again... it never stops.
There is no resting on laurels.
Funny, a few months back I stumbled over the present tense in another scripture. He makes the barren woman a joyful mother of children. He never stops.
Did I mention? This joy thing. It does not come naturally.
Grumbling yes. But the joy? Only grows when I give the grumbling over. When I lay it down at His feet and give thanks.
Like a bud deep within me it waits, needing living water to grow and bloom. And I hold the handle to the door that lets the Gardener in.
No, it does not come naturally. It is nothing but a gift when I sense the creaking of unfolding petals. The melting of snow.
He is making ALL things new. And He never stops.
scriptures ~ Proverbs 14:1, Psalm 113:9, Revelation 21:5
photo credit ~ Karen Miller